War of the Newlyweds

“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life” Proverbs 31:10-12.

A few weeks into our marriage, we began what I like to refer to as: “War of the Newlyweds.” We agreed upon long term goals that we wanted to save for, like paying off our debt, saving for a home, and starting a savings account for our young daughter. It wasn’t until he advised me of my “weekly allowance” that we began our metaphorical fistfights.

I came up with a plethora of excuses: “I don’t have time to plan this out.” Or, “Couponing is for crazy women on TV.” And, “No one else I know has a budget like this.” I worked with our budget allowance for groceries, but did so with a bitter heart. Then, like a beacon of hope, came a tangible result. “Honey, we paid off all the credit cards. Thank you for your hard work.”

Still hesitant to put in the discipline required, I fought him off and chalked the good results up to a newly combined income. Then, last week, my husband shouts from the computer desk, “We paid off my car! We can start saving for a house now!”

What a guy, right? I fought out of my selfishness, but he fought out of selflessness, and has continued to thank me and encourage me, despite my pushback.

Jesus, thank you for your enduring promises. Please, make Proverbs 31 my promise to my family. In moments of selfishness, give me your eyes to see and your heart to change paths, and stay committed just as you do to me.


RelationshipsSarah Witmer